Returning friend expected warmer welcome

DEAR HARRIETTE: I just moved back to my hometown. After college, I moved to Georgia to teach. I didn’t really know anyone there. I had a few estranged cousins I rekindled with, and I made friends with some of my co-workers, but that was about it. I lived in Georgia for three years before the loneliness started weighing on me, so I decided to move back home to Florida. Lucky for me, a few of my college friends had moved there post-grad, so the decision to move home felt easy for me. Now that I’m home, though, it’s nothing like what I expected. Despite being in the same city, my friends seem to have their own grooves. They say they are happy I’m here, but it doesn’t always feel that way. I still feel alone and even left out sometimes. I don’t always get invited to all of their plans, and no one offered to help me or visit me as I moved into my new place. Is our friendship past the honeymoon phase? — Lonely DEAR LONELY: Sadly, you cannot count on other people for your happiness, no matter what your history may be. You have to find ways to fill your cup and be self-sufficient. Note that you moved home after several years, which means years of your friends who remained at home continuing to fortify their bonds and building a life together. You are an outsider. It’s natural that you wouldn’t be invited to everything. That’s not a slight; it’s just life. Stop being upset or insecure. Create opportunities to get together with your friends, and go out and meet some new people. You are responsible for your life and your state of being.